$#^#*#$@#*(&$%#@*(%&&*%(#@

The score is tied 4-4.  Light hitting Michael McKenry is at the plate.  Closer Carlos Marmol has been brought into the game.  The count is 0-2.  There are 2 outs.  I am waiting under the left field bleachers with Amy.  One more strike and we can close down the prize wheel and go home.  It had been a long day and I just wanted to go home.  I was all packed up.  My glove was in my bag.  McKenry fouls off like five pitches and then hits a bomb.  Directly at me.  I do not have my glove on.  I move one step around a rail and stand at the bottom of the staircase.  I’m going to have to try to make a barehand catch.  It hits off my left hand which kills most of the balls momentum, glances off the staircase and is gobbled up by a drunk guy.  Had I just had my glove on it would’ve been the easiest clean catch I could’ve ever made.  A ball couldn’t have been thrown from ten feet away any more accurately than McKenry’s 425 ft + bomb.  And I didn’t get it.  Epic failure.

That was his first ******* ever major league home run.  Anyway, since I’m in a ***** mood, here’s the last three days worth of crappy ballhawking summaries.

7-6-11 PNC Park.

I snagged a ball on the river walk as it bounced out before the gates open.   Then the bad luck began.  I had another one bounce off my chest as I tried to knock it down.  I didn’t get that one, as least Nick did.

When the gates opened, the Pirates were finishing up their BP, I ran right past a ball in the front row.  Nick got that one too.  Luckily I found another one 5 rows back.

Oh, and at 5:03, the cage came down.

The Astros didn’t hit because they needed to have a team meeting to talk about how bad they suck.  It worked because the Pirates blew the game.  I watched the game from the club seats, and missed a chance at a foul ball because I picked the wrong row.

7-7-11 Progressive Field.
I had booked a Megabus trip to Cleveland for Amy and I.  We paid $4 for the round trip ($1 each there and back), however it was just one thing after another.
First, we got stopped on Route 30 for fifteen minutes at 10:15 AM while lazy construction workers painted lines.
Second, I stopped at PNC Park to pick up some tickets for Friday’s game.  I wanted 20 tickets.  Why?  Simple – I can get them for $4.93 each.  Why so many?  Easy?  Sell the shirts, make a profit, and use Pirates gift cards from Giant Eagle to take advantage of their fuel perk program.  Well, stopping at PNC was a huge mistake.  The people at the window wouldn’t deal with me and told me I had to go to the front office.  After waiting in the front office for fifteen minutes for someone to come down, I was told only tickets in section 333 were available.  Fine.  No big deal.  All the while, our 11:15 bus departure time was fast approaching.  I was there for about a half hour, and was ultimately told that I couldn’t purchase tickets at my season ticket price with Pirates gift cards.  They would have to be bought at full price.  So, I left empty handed.

The whole Pirates tickets fiasco ruined my parking plan – we were going to park for free at a school and walk over to the bus stop, but since we had 5 minutes until the bus was to leave, we parked at the convention center and ran to the bus stop.

So, what else went wrong?  Oh yeah, the baggage guy noticed that the bus had a slightly broken break light.

The break light still worked, just the cover was broken.

So, we were delayed by thirty five minutes while the bus driver took pictures on his cell phone and talked to his boss.

And, wouldn’t you know we ended up using the same damn bus anyway.

This pushed our arrival to Cleveland back almost an hour, which made us not be able to eat at that nice Mexican restaurant that we ate at last time.  I was so looking forward to that.

We settled for eating fast food in a mall (Subway) and got to the park at 3:30.

What else could go wrong?  How about the security guy not showing up for his job?  Yeah, that’s right.  The guy that opens the gate didn’t show, so the gates didn’t open until about 4:45.  They’re supposed to open at 4:30 – so, we missed the entire group of Travis Hafner, Shin Shoo Choo, Carlos Santana, Grady Sizemore, etc.

Ridiculous.

I managed to find three balls that workers over looked.

Amy noticed another one go into the bushes and alerted me, and I used the Cleveland stick to snag it.

There were a total of three home runs hit during the entire Indians BP.  Two were close to me that should’ve been caught, but big surprise, there were people in my way and I couldn’t get to them in time to be close enough to catch them.

The Blue Jays really sucked during BP.  It didn’t help that all fans had to stay in right field until 6:00 PM.

Surprisingly, a random Blue Jays outfielder threw me a ball, probably because I was the only ‘Jays’ fan there that held up my glove when he looked towards the crowd.

It was just an awful day.  We also almost missed the bus back to Pittsburgh because we stood in line until 7 to spin the prize wheel and both won worthless buy one get one free Duncan Donuts coupons.

7-8-11 PNC Park

Due to a rain shower that moved through a few hours prior to the gates opening, neither team took batting practice, despite the field being in perfect and dry shape.

When the Cubs came out to throw, John Grabow threw me a ball, but Carlos Marmol demanded that I give it away to the girl next to me.  So I did.

Grabow then signed, but I’m not much one for autographs, so I left.

Nothing else happened until I butchered the McKenry home run.   Hadn’t it been for Amy I wouldn’t have even been there anyway.  Once she stops working there, I won’t be staying at any more games.  I’ll be leaving after batting practice.

Statistics
7-6 2 balls (1 hit, 1 found) Attendance 18,910
7-7 5 balls (1 thrown, 1 device, 3 found) Attendance 18,816
7-8 1 ball (1 thrown)  Attendance 37,160
Season:  288 balls (122 hit, 58 thrown, 65 device, 34 found)
Games: 51 games
Average:  5.65 balls per game
Career:  1,410 balls

2 Comments

Tough stretch man, its the all star break so we can all take a breath and relax, see where we are and re-evaluate things. Baseball always finds a way of evening out when things are going rough, so keep your head in the game. We get about 5 sucky mins of Pirates per day and were still 2-3 in MGB, keep that in mind too!!!!

Tough stretch man, the all star break is here so we can all take a deep breath, relax, and re-evaluate things. Baseball has a way of evening out when your in a rough stretch. Keep your head in the game, we are 2 and 3 in MGB after getting 5-10 sucky mins of Pirate bp per day, keep that in mind.

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